Why do Dave Portnoy's pizza reviews matter? Ask the RI pizzamakers who fed him on Thursday

PROVIDENCE — Frank Schiavone is a confident competitor, adopting the mindset of Michael Jordan and other athletes who hated losing more than they enjoyed winning.

After three years of owning Francesco’s Pizzeria, serving what he believed was the best pizza in Rhode Island, the 37-year old Schiavone was still searching for a way to make his restaurant the first one that comes to mind when naming the best pizza spot in the state.

So he decided to take his shot.

Monday, Schiavone picked up a sign that read "We Want Portnoy" and hung it on the front of his restaurant for all the world to see. Portnoy is Dave Portnoy, the Barstool Sports founder and most important pizza influencer in the country, who Schiavone was now calling out to do a review of Francesco’s when Portnoy was in Providence on Thursday for Barstool Sports’ Rough N’ Rowdy amateur boxing event.

“I’ve been DMing that guy for a year. He’s a part of my morning ritual,” Schiavone said. “I wake up, have coffee, take my dogs out and DM Dave Portnoy.”

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A good review from Portnoy can be a golden ticket and a game-changer for a business. Ask Jeff’s Pizza in East Providence, which received an 8.1 from Portnoy and in the days after the review was posted to YouTube, had to make hand-drawn signs on their front door saying they were sold out because of demand.

“I’ve done so many, the more I do the harder the scale,” said Portnoy, who granted The Journal exclusive access on his four-stop pizza journey in the state on Thursday. “You can’t be giving everybody [great scores]. It reversed because I used to be very mean, but I didn’t want to ruin a business or have ill will.”

When Portnoy travels, pizza shops are ready for his surprise visits — and then they brace for what's next.

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A pizza influencer origin story

In February of 2013, Portnoy and Barstool Sports personality Dan “Big Cat” Katz engaged in a ridiculous debate over which food you could eat for the rest of your life. Katz chose Burrito, Portnoy went pizza and on March 10 of that year, the contest — in which their selected food was the only thing they could eat – began.

During the week, Portnoy ate at different locations and gave quick reviews, saying it only should take one bite to properly score a pizza. The challenge lasted less than week when at the Big 10 Basketball Championships, Katz – dressed in a burrito costume – tempted Portnoy – dressed in a pizza costume – with some popcorn, ending the contest but opening Portnoy’s eyes to something else.

“It was obvious there was something to it,” Portnoy said. “And when we moved [Barstool’s headquarters] from Boston to New York, I said I’d try all the places in New York and it just caught on.”

Hitting all sorts of pizzerias in New York – from mainstays to mom-and-pop shops to $1 slice joints – Portnoy’s “One Bite” pizza reviews soon took hold of the internet. They’re filmed in familiar fashion – Portnoy walks out of the pizza spot, says where he’s at, talks about the pizza, says “one bite, everyone knows the rules,” proceeds to take two or three or more bites, thinks about the score, sometimes goes off on a tangent or interacts with passerby and finally delivers a score. If guests are on and they deliver a whole number, Portnoy mocks their “rookie score” and never, ever lets anyone change a score after it’s been said.

“Part of the reviews, especially in New York, it’s not just the pizza – it’s the people who get involved with it,” Portnoy said. “All my most popular reviews are generally because somebody I didn’t expect to be a part of the review became the main character.”

Dave Portnoy’s first stop in Rhode Island

Portnoy searches out places with a story, which is part of the reason for his first two stops in Rhode Island.

After landing at T.F. Green Thursday, Portnoy – along with cameraman Austin Jenkins and “Security Guard Mike” – went to Merlino’s Pizza in Cranston. Portnoy became aware of the spot from WEEI radio host Courtney Cox. She’s a part of the Greg Hill Show, which has worked to raise money for A.J.’s Army, a foundation set up to raise money for A.J. Quetta, a North Providence native who suffered a spinal cord injury in 2021. Quetta’s father Anthony is an investor in Merlino’s, which opened for business four months ago.

Portnoy arrived unannounced. He walked inside and up to the counter, where Jeff Merlino looked nervous, panicked and excited.

Merlino knew Portnoy’s order – one cheese pizza. Merlino said the call came from a Massachusetts area code, so he thought it could be Portnoy, but wasn’t 100 percent sure.

“We were surprised. Everybody in the business is on alert when they know he’s in town,” Merlino said. “…I can’t say I keep that much of an eye where he is, but we do follow him and I see if he’s doing reviews in the southern part of Mass., you keep an eye thinking he can be in the area.”

Portnoy engaged in brief, casual conversation, then went to work. The second he walked out the doors and started filming, he stopped being Dave Portnoy and immediately became “El Pres,” his online moniker for the last two decades.

The review of Merlino’s was less about pizza and more about Portnoy’s visceral hatred for ex-Providence basketball coach Ed Cooley and explaining why he wasn’t going to be able to make the Georgetown-Providence game Saturday. The animated review quickly switched to pizza and promotion for the night’s Rough ‘N Rowdy event at the AMP, while Merlino watched nervously from inside the shop.

“I could tell he was riled up,” Merlino said. “I was nervous about that. I saw him touch the first piece, threw it down and that didn’t look great, but when he lifted it and there wasn’t a lot of flop, that felt great.”

The “New York Flop” is Portnoy’s nemesis. He prefers a “New Haven style” of pizza – thin, firm crust, with the cheese well done. If a pizza flops, so does the score.

Portnoy scored Merlino’s a 7.4, lower than what Merlino hoped for, but a good score on the Portnoy scale.

On Friday, because of the review, Merlino said the restaurant had its best lunch day since opening by threefold.

“We’ve had a pretty good response initially from guests and we’ve been doing what we can,” Merlino said. “To get a visit from him this early, it’s going to be big for us.”

Francesco’s calls its shot

Portnoy had concerns about Francesco’s, especially after the sign Schiavone hung from his restaurant was a straight up challenge to a man that hasn’t been shy of taking them on.

Schiavone had reason to be confidence. He’s worked in restaurants his entire life, before COVID made him lean on his real estate license. In October of 2021, Schiavone opened Francesco’s, which makes pizza and other Italian dishes using recipes four generations old.

While Schiavone felt he had the best pizza in the city, Francesco’s wasn’t getting the recognition he though it deserved. He was late to dive into social media, but then started to build relationships with Rhode Island food influencers to create a brand and build business.

Schiavone started sending daily direct messages to Portnoy, who admitted Thursday that they got to a point that he nearly blocked Schiavone from sending them. Schiavone hoped the sign would get his attention, and when a call came in from a Massachusetts area code with a name that sounded familiar, he had a feeling his ploy worked.

“The competitive nature that I have, I would never be associated with a pizza shop that’s just decent,” Schiavone said. “I need to do something that’s top notch and do the work. That trickles down to the people I hire and work with and we all had the utmost of confidence.”

When Portnoy walked through the door, Schiavone froze for a moment before taking a big breath and immediately showing his personality to the man who could make or break his business.

Portnoy took his pizza outside while Schiavone and his family watched from inside. The second Portnoy opened the box, he was intrigued and the instant he took his first bite – as well as the second, third and fourth – it was clear Francesco’s was a big winner.

“It was great pizza,” Portnoy told The Journal. “That was great pizza, so it was a relief.”

He announced the score, then questioned himself and asked Jenkins to give his opinion. Portnoy’s score – which will be revealed when the video eventually drops on YouTube – remained, even if both he and Jenkins later agreed it should have been higher.

Schiavone wanted the higher score, but was more than happy with the one given. Now he’s preparing for what’s next because, if tradition holds, a pizzeria that does between 200-225 pies a day will see a significant increase in business.

“My chef was on pins and needles [Thursday] saying ‘how are we going to serve all these people,’” Schiavone said. “I simply said ‘we’re not going to do it one night. We’ll do it to the best of our ability and our biggest challenge is going to be crowd control, expectations on service but not excellent pizza.

“We have excellent pizza and now the rest is up to us.”

Portnoy’s most loyal followers are college-age males and with Brown and Providence College nearby and Rhode Island College and Johnson and Wales within earshot, Schiavone knows what the review means for him and his family.

“This is life-changing, 100 percent,” he said. “This is a new business and the biggest thing for new businesses is recognition. Everything takes time, but now with social media and the following he has, you just fast forward it.

“We’re in Year 3, but now we’re in Year 10 and everyone knows us because of him.”

Portnoy’s quick finish ends at an RI staple

After Francesco’s, Portnoy headed to Nice Slice in Providence, where the cashier went white as a ghost when told by a Journal photographer what he was taking pictures of and when he was coming.

He was in and out of the restaurant in maybe two minutes, paid for his pizza, went outside and spit out a review – where Nice Slice received a very good score – that was, at most, four minutes long before hopping back into a white SUV to head off for the final stop.

“I just go with it,” said Portnoy of how reviews are made. “I don’t put too much thought into it.”

The last stop was D. Palmieri’s in Johnston. Portnoy was told to try their legendary pizza strips, but the review was less than favorable for a style of pizza that only Rhode Islanders seem to love.

When Portnoy gives a negative review, he rarely blames the restaurant. He blames his own personal tastes and clearly, sauce on dough wasn’t what he was looking for.

“We’re known for the party pizza,” owner Stephen Palmieri said. “They don’t eat party pizza in New York.”

Palmieri was in the back of the bakery when Portnoy came in and thought the party pizza order was just like any of the others they receive. After the initial review, he offered to make Portnoy a cheese pizza. Portnoy agreed, hanging outside of the bakery as people pulled out of traffic on Killingly Street and pulled into the bakery’s side lot for a chance to take a selfie with the man who might be known more for pizza than for his multi-million dollar business.

“That’s probably the No. 1 way people recognize me now,” Portnoy said. “They say ‘oh, you’re the pizza guy’ and they may not know anything about Barstool.”

Palmieri was joined by son Eric, “The Pizza Artist,” who created a portrait of Portnoy made of pepperoni and other pizza toppings two years ago. They handed him the pizza, then watched him go to work.

Of the four stops Portnoy made Thursday, D. Palmieri’s was the one with the least to gain. If you haven’t had D. Palmieri’s, you’re not actually a Rhode Islander. But there was some curiosity to see what an outsider thought and no real overexcitement about a score that will certainly gain attention once the full review is posted.

“We do what we do. We’re not trying to get nervous about it,” Eric Palmieri said. “It’s not like one of those outstanding, crazy scores but it’s a great score and it’s great publicity.

“It’s just really cool to meet him more than anything else.”

Portnoy shook hands, jumped in the back of the SUV and took off to serve as a color commentator for Thursday’s Rough N’ Rowdy fight. Portnoy, a Massachusetts native, built Barstool on the back of New England and has been on the call each of the three times Rough N’ Rowdy has come to Rhode Island.

He couldn’t confirm if or when it would return, but if or when it does, you can be sure what kind of food he’ll be eating that day.

“I could eat pizza forever,” Portnoy said. “As long as there’s spots to go, which I think there always will be.”

This article originally appeared on The Providence Journal: Dave Portnoy brings his 'One Bite' Pizza Reviews to Rhode Island