She wasn't everyone's favourite First Lady, but here's what we'll miss about Melania Trump

Here is Melania Trump, wife of outgoing president Donald, arguably not the most loved First Lady in history. But you know, we’re (probably) not going to be seeing as much of her now and inevitably there will be things about her that we’ll miss. If you’re not convinced, then here are a few reminders:

Her Heels

Even in an emergency flood zone, Melania was welded to her very high, very narrow stiletto heels. In a world where the unwalkable heel has become an endangered species, we can’t help but admire her stalking pluck. And she does wear them like a pro.

Her White House Christmas decorative schemes

Razor sharp, ice cold, eerily uplit, always reminiscent of an early Doctor Who set or a ghost ride at Walt Disney World (remember the blood red furry trees?) We were scared every single year. Not very child-friendly, that’s for sure.

Her resting wolf face

Never let it be said that Melania is not striking. Had things turned out differently for her, she would have made an excellent Bond villain (possibly with an eye patch) or Countess Dracula.

Her understanding of the perils of marrying money

Barbara Amiel noted, in her memoir/takedown of the circle that abandoned her once Conrad Black had fallen from grace, that Melania was one of the few who reached out and let her use her spa. A sister in adversity – who would have thought?

Her lack of sentimentality

Melania does not look like the sort of woman who would relish escorting primary school children through a winter wonderland or reading them The Snowman (or the US equivalent). So it was pleasing to have all our suspicions confirmed when Flotus was caught on tape, sounding off about Christmas to her former adviser, Stephanie Winston Wolkoff. What she said was: “I’m working my ass off at Christmas stuff that, you know, who gives a f--- about Christmas stuff and decorations? But I need to do it, right?” Definitely a moment when we felt quite warmly towards her.

Her aversion to fake hand-holding

How many times have we witnessed Trump trying to maintain the appearance of a united front, only to have his hand swatted away by an imperious hands-free Melania? Lots. Multiple times, as Trump might say. And every one a joy.

Her ‘Travel Barbie’ themed outfits

She wore a pith helmet, white shirt and khakis tucked into boots on a visit to Africa. And the look she picked for dropping into the Texas disaster zone after Hurricane Harvey was Ray-Bans, bomber jacket, black trousers and 5in black stilletos (CIA Barbie). Had she gone to China, it probably would have been dragon lady cheongsam and fishnets with orchid-trimmed hairpiece. Shame.

Her virtue-free signalling

Was it wise of the wife of the President of the United States to wear a parka with the words “I really don’t care, do U?” emblazoned on the back as she flew to Texas to meet migrant children at the US-Mexico border? Was it, in fact, a deliberate message to the watching world? Was it just a coat she liked and a dose of bad luck? All this was the subject of much debate at the time. And since we all quite enjoy those debates, we’re going to be needing something else to quarrel about when she’s gone.

Is it just me...

Who is – much as we’ll miss Melania – intrigued by the incoming Flotus, Jill Biden? So far we don’t know much about her, other than that she’s a reliable prompt, but since she held up that old house sign – covering up the word Vice so that it read “Dr and President Biden live here” – it’s clear she’s got a good sense of humour and a sense of perspective. What better training for a First Lady than eight years as the Second Lady and having a full-time job as a teacher of young adults? Feeling hopeful about this one.

Is it OK to...

Be enjoying all the people lining up in advance of the new series of The Crown (starting tomorrow) to tell us how it really was. So far, first prize goes to the Buckingham Palace intruder, Michael Fagan, who tells us that the Queen did not, as the show suggests, ask “Have you come far?” (Here’s hoping they’re not playing this series for laughs). In reality she legged it, telling him, “I’ll be back in a minute.” She wasn’t, but a footman was. He took one look at Fagan, said, “You look like you need a drink, mate,” led him to the pantry and poured him a whisky. How good is that?