The Scottish town that gave birth to the deep-fried Mars bar
Dunnottar Castle, balanced on a rocky outcrop, battered on three sides by a frothing sea, looks like something swept in from a film set. Which is precisely what it has been on several occasions. Its picture-perfect fortifications have been utilised in such movies as Daniel Radcliffe’s Victor Frankenstein, Pixar’s Brave and, most notably, Franco Zeffirelli’s 1990 version of Hamlet, starring a bleached blonde Mel Gibson as the Danish prince.
Yet its history is more exciting than any cinematic fabulation, with no shortage of royals, routing and rebellion.
The one-time home of the Earls of Marischal was the scene of intense drama during the Scottish Wars of Independence, and when the Scottish Crown Jewels were hidden there in 1651, Oliver Cromwell besieged the castle for eight months, determined to destroy the sceptre and orb, only to be thwarted by Christine Grainger, the wife of the Reverend Grainger of nearby Kineff parish, who despite being heavily pregnant smuggled the jewels out in her skirts, on to a boat and safely down the coast.
Earlier still, William Wallace reclaimed the castle from the English in 1297. Terrified by the progress of Wallace’s troops, as many as 4,000 English soldiers holed themselves within the stone chapel inside Dunnottar Castle – believing that hiding out in a church would spare them from death. Wallace burnt them alive, although the scene didn’t feature in 1995’s war epic Braveheart (the Gibson links are strong in these parts).
Given that film was responsible for propagating some of the more cartoonish aspects of Scottish history (the Smurf-blue faces), perhaps Gibson’s time on the Aberdeenshire coastline coincided with the Stonehaven Highland Games, where kilted Scots in full Highland dress, toss the caber, throw the hammer and play the bagpipes. It’s the sort of occasion (there are more than 80 such games held in Scotland) beloved of foreign tourists, who arrive looking for their own bit of Brigadoon.
Stonehaven’s Highland Games are a bit more frequent than every 100 years, but the event was cancelled due to bad weather in 2012 and 2015. Given that a grey day is the rule rather than the exception in this part of the world, it makes you wonder how bad it had to get before they hung up their sporrans.
But regardless of the weather, and whether this year’s games go ahead (a week tomorrow), Stonehaven is well worth a visit, even if not exactly daytrippable for anyone south of Hadrian’s Wall.
Situated a mile to the north of Dunnottar, and despite the muted grey colour palette of its buildings and the sunbather-proof shingle beach, it’s a lot more amiable than you first imagine. Helpfully, it has claims to fame beyond its proximity to the castle. Chiefly, the town is the birthplace of Robert William Thomson, inventor of both the pneumatic tyre and the fountain pen. And it is the home of Scotland’s latter-day national dish: the original deep-fried Mars bar is said to have been made at the local Haven Fish Bar.
Scotland's most remote and beautiful islands
The town’s name refers to the fact that in earlier times the shorehead provided a refuge for sailors from the rugged Aberdeenshire coastline. Once a thriving fishing village, today sees a daily outgoing of commuters to nearby Aberdeen and an influx of tourists.
Stonehaven
A sedate seaside enclave (except at Hogmanay when volunteers walk the high street swinging huge fireballs at the end of chains, which are finally extinguished in the harbour), Stonehaven has a family-friendly feel, coupled with a pleasing dearth of kiss-me-quick amusement arcades. Take a ramble in the woods, or a dip in the Olympic-sized outdoor swimming pool, built in 1934 and filled with a mixture of tap water and filtered seawater – it’s the northernmost lido in the UK. Or settle down with a pint at one of the pubs on the shorehead and consider times past.
There’s plenty to soak up here, but if you’re hungry for more, a deep-fried chocolate bar will put paid to that.
Daytripper | More from our series on UK days out
Eight smashing reasons to visit Stonehaven
The walk
The 1.7-mile walk from Stonehaven Harbour to Dunnottar Castle takes you high onto the cliffs, and past a striking war memorial. Pass ploughed fields and descend on to the beach to spot kittiwakes and razorbills, before making the dramatic ascent to Dunnottar.
The castle
Although almost entirely ruined (thanks to Cromwell), there are still rooms intact and it doesn’t take much to imagine what life would have been like at Dunnottar Castle. In case you’re struggling, there are plenty of information points and a handy guide on entry. ￡7 adults; ￡17 for a family ticket.
The ice-cream parlour
Located on the prom, Aunty Bettys is a popular choice. Don’t let the lengthy queue put you off – it’s well worth waiting for your chance to choose from the huge range of flavours on offer, both unusual and traditional.
The museum
Learn more about Stonehaven’s rich history at the Tolbooth Museum. The original building is thought to have been founded by George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal (c 1553-1623), to act as a storehouse during the construction of the nearby Dunnottar Castle. At one point it was a prison, too.
The gift shop
Located in the market square, My Beautiful Caravan sells retro-inspired gifts and collectables. Design lovers will covet the prints of the Stonehaven prom and Dunnottar Castle.
The gallery
Eion Stewart opened his gallery on Allardice Street in 2011. It features work of Scottish artists, and includes many depictions of the dramatic local landscape.
The chippy
The Bay Fish and Chips opened in 2006 and has been packed to the gunnels with hungry customers ever since. It won the UK’s Best Independent Takeaway at the 2013 National Fish and Chip awards and is committed to spreading its message of sustainable food and fishing.
The pub
The Marine Hotel overlooks Stonehaven Harbour, and is a five-minute walk from Stonehaven Beach. Enjoy a pint at the bar, or find a table and order some locally sourced scran.
