The picture that will make you want to stop drinking
In July 2020, at the age of 48, I was three stone overweight. I had a swollen, puffy face that was flushed red and covered in spider veins. I sweated profusely, even in winter.
The first thing I did every morning was vomit bile or blood. Strange bruises had started to appear on my stomach, even though I hadn’t walked into anything. I later discovered that the bruises were caused by my drinking – an enormous daily consumption of alcohol that had affected the clotting factor in my blood. My blood pressure had soared to a dangerously high 190/100, and I was put on two hypertension medications.
At my worst, I was drinking three bottles of wine a day, topped up with shots of rum. But since July 16 2020, I haven’t touched a drop.
When I stopped, I did it “cold turkey”, which in hindsight was dangerous. It could have caused seizures and, at the levels I was drinking, might even have been fatal. I was lucky. And after a few days of shakiness and unsteadiness, my health began to improve.
I didn’t realise how ill I had felt until I quit. Some of the changes happened quickly, others were subtle, and I can only pinpoint them by looking at photos over time and comparing my progress.
Almost immediately I stopped throwing up and dry-heaving in the mornings. My facial puffiness started to subside over the first month and I stopped constantly sweating. After six months my blood pressure was back to a normal 120/80, and I was able to stop one of the medications I took (the other I still need for an unrelated heart condition).
It took time for the weight to come off because I initially substituted the booze with sweet snacks. But by the start of year two I had lost two-and-a-half stone. The brain fog lifted and I fell in love with life again, reconnecting with my family and friends. It’s now been two-and-a-half years since I’ve had a drink.
You don’t have to be an alcoholic to benefit from time off the booze, so whether you want to follow my example and stop altogether or just take a pause for Dry January, here are my seven tips for staying off the drink – and sticking to it.
Consider seeing a GP or other medical professional
Many people can stop drinking alcohol without any problems. But if you’ve been drinking every day and have experienced withdrawals – however slight – you should speak to a doctor before you quit, as going “cold turkey” can be dangerous. Signs of withdrawal can include feeling clumsy or headachy the day after drinking. The giveaway is that they immediately improve when you have alcohol.
If you are worried about anything going on your medical records, there are charities or apps that can offer advice, such as DrinkAware or DrinkCoach. Should things be particularly bad, there are substance misuse services listed on the NHS website or try Alcoholics Anonymous, which has online meetings if you don’t feel ready for face-to-face contact.
Keep a drink journal (on paper or via an app)
To give up successfully you have to be honest about how much you drink. Keeping track of everything can help with this (and don’t lie to yourself, which is what I used to do, then feel ashamed – you will know if you have a problem).
A journal can also help you identify your triggers, which are the feelings that lead to you picking up a drink. For me, it was family visits. Whenever I came home from my parents’ house, I thought: “God, I need a drink.” When you know what triggers you, you can start to manage or avoid it.
Avoid temptation
I used to love a glass of wine when I was making dinner, chopping up the veg. My arm would instinctively go out for the glass. Then I would run a bath and continue drinking while I was in there. So what did I do after I gave up? I started to take showers. And I stopped making dinner for a while.
If you’ve decided to stop drinking and you go to the supermarket, avoid the alcohol aisle. If you find yourself there, ask yourself why.
To start with, I switched to fizzy drinks to get that sugar fix, but that wasn’t particularly healthy either. Three years on, I am happy with drinking camomile tea but it took me a while to get here.
Don’t go out
You go to a bar or a restaurant and everyone around you is drinking alcohol – so why put yourself in that position? If you’re doing Dry January, there’s a built-in excuse: it’s cold and you don’t have any money. Otherwise, just give yourself permission to stay at home or go home early. Nominate yourself as designated driver. Put your sobriety first.
Think of your overall health
It’s not just your liver – it’s your brain chemistry, your kidneys: all of these have to heal. When I was tempted to pick up a glass, I imagined my insides to be lurid neon green. The longer I went without a drink, the nicer the colour they became in my imagination.
Moving around physically can really help: take up yoga or join a gym. If you have been drinking heavily, be aware that your coordination may take time to recover and don’t expect too much.
Fill your brain with books and podcasts to replace the call for booze. If you feel you need therapy to nourish your mind and get rid of the guilt or other difficult emotions, seek it out.
A slip is not a disaster
If you cave in and have a drink, this is not an excuse to say “sod it” and hit the bottle again. Think about what triggered this episode and learn from it – then carry on with your excellent work.
Note: if you do start drinking again, be aware that your tolerance will have gone down. At my worst, I was drinking three bottles of wine a day. If I did that now, it would probably kill me.
Don’t quit quitting
Stopping drinking is like smoking: some people find it easy at the start, others get tempted down the track. Everyone’s path is different. It’s one thing to put a bottle down and quite another to stop yourself picking it up again. You can do it.
Nikki Rushin tweets at @asoberlady
As told to Miranda Levy
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