‘Off to a rocky start’: Meghan and Harry’s much-hyped Archewell Audio podcast is a right royal miss
Podcasting is the hot new trend among celebrities, with A-listers such as Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey and Louis Theroux all making a bid for our precious earbud time. And now comes perhaps the most anticipated celebrity “cast” of the year: the first serving of Harry and Meghan’s “Archewell Audio” for Spotify.
It arrives amid a great deal of hype and also considerable curiosity. When the trailer for Archewell “dropped” earlier in the month, it raised many, many questions. Would Harry continue to pronounce 2020 as “Twenny Twenny?” into the future? Is that really the correct way to say “Archewell?” How will this all play out as an episode of The Crown?
And now, finally, almost a fortnight later, comes the real deal: a “holiday special” mega-serving of Meghan and Harry. Although, “mega” probably isn’t the word. The first surprise is the comparatively abbreviated run time of just 33 minutes. In theory, that’s a long time to spend waiting to hear if Harry says “twenny twenny” again (which he does – albeit softly, as if he’s hoping nobody will notice).
But in our present era of marathon podcasts – Spotify’s top-rating Joe Rogan Experience regularly clocks in at over three hours – the “holiday special” will have left Sussex “stans” feeling short-changed. Would it really have been that challenging to stretch it out to an hour? Harry could have pitched in with some dad jokes, Meghan shared some gossip from the set of Suits. We’d have been over the 60-minute mark before we knew it.
Then again, inane nattering might not have fit with the Archewell mission statement to “build community through shared experience, narratives, and values”. Instead, the Crimbo cracker features relatively little of the couple. It doesn’t even begin with their voices.
We open with a random assemblage of celebrities and campaigners (and James Corden) reflecting on 2020, officially the Most Rubbish Year Ever. “Twenty twenty… the year we stopped taking our existence for granted,” says one celeb (we don’t yet know who they are, so it’s just famous-ish voices bobbing in the void). “The year that I became more grateful for the things and the people around me,” declares another.
This goes on for a while (not too long – there’s only half an hour to play with) and then in swoop the posh Posh and Becks. “Welcome to our twenny twenny holiday special from Archewell Audio… I’m Harry,” says Harry. “And I’m Meghan,” says Meghan.
“As we all know it’s been a YEAR,” continues Harry. “And we really wanna honour the compassion and kindness that has helped so many people get through it.”
“And at the same time to honour those who have experienced uncertainty and unthinkable loss…” says Meghan.
They’re clearly fluent in the self-improvement vernacular of their new home in California. Yet, as co-presenters, Meghan and Harry are undeniably a good match. They have chemistry. They don’t talk over one another. And they resist trying to fill the occasional silences with forced gags. If being Royal and living in America doesn’t work out, they might have a future in breakfast radio.
It’s just a shame we don’t hear more from them. Like star footballers yanked off 10 minutes into a meaningless friendly, they spend the rest of the running time listening from the sidelines as their all-star guests lob gooey self-help bromides. Elton John, James Corden, rapper and spoken word artist George the poet and guru Deepak Chopra are among the household names invited to send in short snippets in which they recount their experiences of the 12 months just gone and their hopes for 2021.
This doesn’t leave much space for Meghan and Harry to be Meghan and Harry. That is frustrating, as there are moments when it seems they’re on the verge of a bit of right royal bantering. Harry, for instance, observes that having to tell someone at the other end of a Zoom call that they’re on “mute” is one of the “defining phrases” of 2020.
And they sign off sweetly by declaring that, no matter what life throws in our direction, “love always wins”. The message is accompanied by the refrain from This Little Light of Mine, the old spiritual song that brought down the curtain on their 2018 wedding. It’s obviously enormously gooey – you can almost sense the treacle pumping into your eardrums as you listen. But the sentiments feel genuine. Besides, it’s their podcast. They have licence to be as sappy as they wish.
The problem is the stuff in between. Public tolerance for celebs banging on about what a weird year they’ve had is already past breaking point. And now here comes more of the same. Elton John reveals that he’s attending his weekly AA meetings by Zoom. James Corden says he doesn’t suffer from Fomo and could spend days staring at his rug.
True, not every observation is as bland. Writer Matt Haig recalls his pain at being unable to attend the funeral of a family friend. George the Poet speaks of his newfound appreciation for taking walks and seeing loved ones. These thoughts are shared with humility and humanity.
Yet where, amid the virtual group hugs and mindfulness sermons, are Harry and Meghan? Archewell will surely only become essential listening if it offers a window into their world and provides glimpses of the real people behind the A-list aura. Sadly, on their Spotify debut the Sussexes come ever so slightly unstuck. Archewell may end well. But it’s off to a rocky start.
