Your Moon Sign Is The Key To Understanding What You Need In A Relationship
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ARIES
You feel more fulfilled when you’re in an environment that allows you to speak up about your feelings and not be judged or boxed in for that. You have an emotional need to be first, whether it’s grabbing the new iPhone that was just released or climbing the corporate ladder faster than other people your age. You’re easily inspired and can jump into things before you realize if it’s what you really want. But you also like to be challenged and will fight for things you believe in. You love championing a good cause, and can get a lot of fulfillment out of that.
TAURUS
You like material goods, Taurus. Your love language comes in the form of gifts and you want to be comfortable in life. While there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s important to know that this is the case, and to make sure that you don’t stay in a bad situation or relationship because the material side of it is good. BTW: Good sex is pretty important to you in a relationship. If it’s lacking, you may go elsewhere. You also don’t like to be pushed into things, and want to make sure that you have time to think things over before you act.
GEMINI
You need to be heard and listened to, in life and at work. That’s also true in relationships—you need a partner who is a good communicator, or it just won’t work. You have a constant need to work to feel content and peaceful in your inner mind and, if you don’t, you’ll keep working at it until you do. You may end up juggling more than one relationship at once to find what you really like—and that’s OK.
CANCER
You’re very emotional, Cancer, and tend to have a lot of feelings. You want to take care of others, but deep down you also want to make sure you’re taken care of. You can hang on to relationships past their prime because you don’t want to throw away all the energy and effort you put into them, making it painful to let go. You also want a home where you can feel comfortable, and love the idea of creating your own family.
LEO
You like to shine, Leo, and crave being the center of attention. You have an emotional need to be appreciated, whether it’s in a relationship or at work. Even though you want everyone to see that you’re special, the world doesn’t necessarily work that way—and you have to learn to make peace with that. You love to have fun and party, and can be very generous and loyal with your friends. Just know that loyalty has its limits—people change, and don’t always deserve your love with time.
VIRGO
You have a need to be able to have your life in order, Virgo. Maybe your closet has to be arranged a certain way, or your work life has to be just so. Whatever it is, it’s OK. However, it’s important to recognize that perfection isn’t always possible: Sometimes you just have to let things go. You’re also happy and fulfilled when you feel like you’re living a healthy lifestyle. You can be picky in relationships, but there’s nothing wrong with that as long as you’re not so picky that you write off someone who can be amazing for you.
LIBRA
You love relationships, Libra, and you’re always looking for your other half. You love having someone to do things with, whether it’s a friend or S.O. You tend to be super accommodating, and people naturally gravitate toward you. You naturally want to choose a partner who is like you so there’s not a lot of arguing in the relationships. Just make sure that you’re not taken advantage of. Your desire to be a natural peacemaker can leave you open to being a doormat if you’re not careful.
SCORPIO
You’re intense at times and can have trust issues, but you’re also a very intuitive person. You know when people are lying to you, and hate when people keep secrets from you. You like to know everything about others in order to feel like you can trust them, but it’s important to learn to trust your intuition—otherwise, you’ll just end up being totally paranoid that other people will hurt you. You also dig competition. Just make sure that stays more along the lines of working out and advancing your career and less in competing with someone else for love—that only spells trouble.
SAGITTARIUS
You want it all, Sag, and there’s nothing wrong with that. You crave freedom, traveling the world, and knowing as much as possible. You can get unhappy when you feel trapped, whether it’s in a relationship or by life circumstances.
You need to be with someone that you feel will let you grow and won’t keep you tied down. You have a fear of being judged, but you also tend to judge others. You tend to get drawn into arguments and debates, and love to be right. Just know that it’s not going to happen every time—and that’s OK.
CAPRICORN
You have a fear of not having everything be just so, and love being prepared for everything that life might throw at you. But you want to be so prepared in life that you can spend years preparing for a promotion because you don’t want to get into something where you’ll fail. Just know that it’s important to be willing to take a risk here and there. In relationships, you’re very loyal once you commit—it just can take you a little time to get to that point. You’re super responsible, but need to have strong boundaries so your reliability isn’t taken advantage of at work.
AQUARIUS
You have a strong need to be different and find where you belong, Aquarius. You love experiences with people, places, and situations that are different from what you grew up with, and are often drawn to people from different cultures and countries. Still, you’re always be looking for someplace to fit in. If you’re not able to have new experiences, you can feel detached from the people around you, which is why it’s so crucial for you to travel when you can. You have a need for strong friendships and relationships and will often stay buddies with an ex when things don’t work out.
PISCES
You’re the romantic of the zodiac, and love being loved. But you can get into trouble when you feel that life is unfair or that someone is treating you badly. You can easily end up feeling victimized. You often want to have answers to questions that are unanswerable, and can be seriously impacted by tragedies. You find fulfillment when you can do something where you help alleviate suffering or do something that you believe in, even if it’s as simple as helping a friend out.
Many astrology-obsessed people are pretty familiar with their Sun sign—it’s the zodiac sign that aligns with your personality (and is the basis of most monthly horoscope predictions). But Moon signs are something completely different.
While your Sun sign represents the way people perceive you, especially their first impression, your Moon sign suggests “what’s hidden in your personality. The Moon is who you really are—the most sensitive parts,” says professional astrologer Narayana Montúfar. In other words, the traits of your moon sign might not be evident to others unless they really get to know you.
As one of your “big three” (a.k.a your Sun, Moon, and Rising sign), your Moon informs your inner world. Additionally, as “luminaries,” your Sun and Moon signs are counterparts—just like they create eclipses together, they also work in tandem to form aspects of both your masculine and feminine sides, says Montúfar. Your personality goes beyond just what people see on the outside, so what’s going on in your mind and in your heart—a.k.a what your Moon sign controls—is just as influential as your Sun sign in determining your core identity.
What is a Moon sign, exactly?
In astrology, your Sun sign reflects your outward personality, while your Moon sign controls your emotions and mood, says Donna Page, a professional astrologer and counselor. “The moon rules the night and our emotional world,” Page explains. “It’s huge in determining your overall personality.”
Because the moon acts like the counterpart to the sun, which Montúfar says represents masculine energy, the moon represents the opposite. “The Moon sign is more in tune with your feminine side, and your private self,” she says. “You really know someone, what makes them tick, and their emotions when you get to know their Moon sign.”
Think of your Sun sign as how other people see you—the job you choose, where you like to live, your style. Your Moon sign is more about how you respond to what life throws your way. It also helps set a foundation of emotional stability and support for you, so it’s kind of a big deal, Page says.
How do I find my Moon sign?
Your Moon sign is determined by the position of the moon in the sky at the specific time of your birth.
To calculate your Moon sign, it’s pretty simple—you’ll need to know the date, place, and time you were born. The moon moves through the zodiac pretty often (so it might be totally different from your Sun sign!), which is why you need so many specifics for this one. There are plenty of online calculators that can do the work for you, including the Moon Sign Calculator on Montúfar’s website, but this one from CafeAstrology.com should also do the trick.
How does your Moon sign affect your life?
For starters, knowing your Moon sign “can tell you how you respond to situations on an emotional level,” Page notes. “It also tells you what you need in personal relationships for people to understand why you respond the way you do.”
In terms of how your Moon sign affects your life on a broader scale, Montúfar says that the moon is super important in determining so many things about your health, relationships, and needs.
“On a spiritual level, the Moon sign shows us what we really need to feel fulfilled,” she says. “If you don’t feel emotionally fulfilled, you can’t manifest the life of your dreams.”
How does your Moon sign impact your relationships?
Did you know that your Moon sign can determine a lot about how you move about your relationships, even from the earliest stages of your life? Your Moon sign “sheds light on what you need in order to feel safe, stable, and secure,” explains Aliza Kelly, an astrologer and author of There Are No Coincidences: A Manifestation Deck and Guidebook. Because of this, she suggests that “we can use the Moon sign as insight into what someone needed in their childhood—and maybe what someone was lacking in their childhood that they then feel a deficit of.”
As Kelly notes, “It's really important that your romantic partner can speak to and satiate your lunar needs–which are not always the same as your solar needs.” Kelly adds that while your solar needs may include how you want to be perceived and how you want others to experience you, your lunar needs may require you to ask yourself: “What's going to comfort me? How am I going to feel like I'm not alone? How am I going to feel like I’m safe?” These are a few things to keep in mind when it comes to your romantic partner and how they make you feel.
You might also consider how compatible your Moon sign is with your partner's Moon sign as that can determine what you need from them, how you will relate emotionally, and even your overall compatibility in a relationship.
While compatible moons may feel mutually understood and emotionally aligned, incompatible moons may struggle with appropriately responding to each other's triggers and moods, Women's Health previously reported.
While Moon sign compatibility is never “make or break,” according to Montúfar, it’s still an important factor to consider when you’re building a partnership with someone.
What does my Moon sign mean?
Once you’ve found your Moon sign, here’s everything to know about how it plays into your personality:
Aries Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Mars
Key Traits: Passionate, Fiery, Brave
With Mars as its ruling planet, Aries is an intense, fiery, passionate sign. If your Moon sign is Aries, you feel more fulfilled when you’re in an environment that allows you to speak up about your feelings. “You have the ability to say, ‘If I need this, then I need this,’” Page explains.
“Aries Moons are very righteous, they're very action-oriented. They definitely are very competitive,” Kelly adds. “For them, the feeling of safety is very wrapped up in wanting to be free. They don't want to be limited by things. They want the autonomy and the agency to make choices.”
You have an emotional need to be first, whether it’s grabbing the new iPhone or climbing the corporate ladder faster than your peers. The plus side? You’re easily inspired. The minus? You can jump into something before you realize if it’s what you actually want. But you also enjoy a challenge and will fight for what you believe in. After all, they call Mars the planet of war for a reason, says Montúfar.
Taurus Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Venus
Key Traits: Grounded, Stable, Comforting
Got a Moon sign in Taurus? Your love language comes in the form of giving/receiving gifts, and you want to be comfortable in life. Nothing wrong with that, buuut it might make you more likely to stay in a bad situation or relationship if the material side of it is good. (BTW: Good sex is pretty important to you in a relationship. If it’s lacking, you may go elsewhere.) “You have a need not to be pushed into something,” Page adds, noting that you also want to make sure you have time to think things over before you act.
The good news, though, is that Taurus is the moon’s favorite sign, explains Montúfar. If your Moon sign is Taurus, she says that your Moon sign is “very strong”—and that this can definitely work in your favor. “The moon is exalted in Taurus, which means it’s thriving, it loves to be there, and the reason it really loves to be there is because the moon in Taurus is all about blossoming and growing and expanding,” Kelly explains. “Those with a Taurus Moon are really dedicated to their self-care, they're dedicated to their emotional needs, they really need to create healthy systems for themselves in order to thrive.”
Lean into your proclivity toward enjoying things that stimulate your senses, and focus on your self-care. That can help bring the security and stability you crave.
Gemini Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Mercury
Key Traits: Curious, Analytical, Inquisitive
If your Moon sign is in Gemini, you need to be heard and listened to—in life and at work. “Not necessarily just to have people communicate with you, but to be welcomed and understood,” Page says.
That’s also true in relationships: You need a partner who is a good communicator, or it just won’t work. You have a constant need to work to feel content and peaceful in your inner mind and, if you don’t, you’ll keep at it until you do. You may end up juggling more than one relationship at once to find what you really like—and that’s okay. (You can’t help it that you’re so popular!)
Ruled by Mercury, Geminis tend to be social butterflies and “flutter” all over different social situations and groups. When your Moon sign is in Gemini, Montúfar says this can mirror your emotional world, with your emotions being “all over the place.” It’s a good idea to be aware of this, and check in with yourself about how you’re really feeling from time to time.
Cancer Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: The Moon
Key Traits: Sensitive, Supportive, Vulnerable
“The Moon in Cancer is in its natal or domicile position–the moon speaks to Cancer energy,” says Kelly. “Cancer is sensitive, it's constantly changing, it's constantly cycling through different emotions just like the phases of the moon.”
With a Moon sign in Cancer, you’re very emotional and tend to have a lot of feelings. You want to take care of others, but deep down, you also want to make sure you’re taken care of, too. “You have a need for someone to understand how you feel about something,” Page adds. With the moon as its ruling planet, Cancer is a Moon sign that is highly impacted by the cycles of the moon, so paying attention to how that affects you can help you better understand your emotional needs—and how to fulfill them, says Montúfar.
You also tend to hang on to relationships past their prime because you don’t want to throw away all the energy and effort you put into them, making it painful to let go. And you want a home where you can feel comfortable and love the idea of creating your own family.
Leo Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: The Sun
Key Traits: Theatrical, Expressive, Vibrant
With your ruling planet being the sun, you like to shine, Moon sign in Leo, and crave being the center of attention (uh, duh!). Montúfar says this can manifest in a special kind of magnetism that really draws people to you.
You have an emotional need to be appreciated, whether it’s in a relationship or at work. “You need to feel that people recognize you as special,” Page says. Even though you want everyone to see your awesomeness, the world doesn’t necessarily work that way, so...learn to make peace with that.
You also love to have fun and party, and can be very generous and loyal with your friends. Just remember that people change, and don’t always deserve your love.
Virgo Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Mercury
Key Traits: Thoughtful, Particular, Organized
If your Moon sign is in Virgo, you feel compelled to be able to have your life in order. “You need people to understand that you’re not being critical—you’re seeking perfection,” Page says. Maybe your closet has to be arranged a certain way, or your work life has to be just so. Totally okay to have your preferences, but remember that perfection isn’t always possible. Let it go!
“Virgo Moon people can struggle in the realm of emotions because Mercury wants to analyze everything, and emotions aren’t rational,” explains Montúfar. Because of this, if your Moon is in Virgo, go easy on yourself and how you’re feeling at any given moment. You don’t have to fully understand and make sense of everything all of the time.
As a Virgo Moon, you’re also happy and fulfilled when you feel like you’re living a healthy lifestyle (green smoothie, anyone?). Also worth noting: You can be picky in relationships, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Just don’t be so picky that you write off someone who could be amazing for you.
Libra Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Venus
Key Traits: Social, Artistic, Elegant
Got a Libra Moon sign? You love relationships, and you’re always looking for your other half. You enjoy having someone to do things with, whether it’s a friend or an S.O. “You have a need for peace and harmony, in relationships and the world,” Page says. That explains why you naturally want to choose a partner who is like you—similarities ensure fewer arguments that could sink your ‘ship.
“Libra is associated with fairness and justness–it’s the scales of balance. So often, with this Moon, we’re really thinking about how we affect other people and how other people affect us,” says Kelly. “[Libra Moons] are very social, very aware of their environment, and [interested in making] a good impression.”
You tend to be super accommodating, and people naturally gravitate toward you. The downside: Your desire to be a natural peacemaker can turn you into a doormat if you’re not careful.
Scorpio Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Pluto (Classical Ruler: Mars)
Key Traits: Intense, Intuitive, Private
You’re intense at times and can have trust issues, but you’re also a very intuitive person. You know when people are lying to you—and hate when people keep secrets from you. “There is a need to know that I can trust you,” Page says of those with a Moon sign in Scorpio. You have to learn to trust your instincts—otherwise, you’ll just end up being totally paranoid that people will hurt you.
Even though this cautiousness can make it hard for you to open up to others sometimes, Montúfar says that a Moon sign in Scorpio can have its upsides. “It makes them resilient and strong, like a survivor. They are committed lovers and friends, they feel very intensely.”
You also dig competition. Just make sure that stays more along the lines of advancing your career and less in competing with someone else for love—that only spells trouble.
Sagittarius Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Jupiter
Key Traits: Adventurous, Exploratory, Philosophical
With a Moon sign in Sagittarius, you want it all—and there’s nothing wrong with that. You crave freedom, traveling the world, and knowing as much as possible. You can get unhappy when you feel trapped, whether it’s in a relationship or by life circumstances. You need to be with someone that you feel will let you grow and won’t keep you tied down—and who will be upfront with you. “You have a need for the truth and don’t want to be lied to,” Page says.
Because Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter, the planet of abundance, you’re one lucky duck. Montúfar says that people with a Sagittarius Moon sign “are very abundant with their time and money. People want to be around them, they’re fun, full of knowledge, and very lucky.”
Oh, and FYI: You have a fear of being judged, but also tend to judge others. You have a knack for getting drawn into arguments and debates, and looove to be right. Just know that it’s not going to happen every time.
Capricorn Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Saturn
Key Traits: Ambitious, Reliable, Consistent
If your Moon sign is in Capricorn, you have a fear of not having everything be just so, and love being prepared for anything and everything life might throw at you. But, you sometimes over-prepare, which may keep you from taking on new opportunities.
“Capricorn Moon is really hardworking, it holds itself to a really high standard,” says Kelly. She notes that because of this, someone with a Capricorn Moon may have a difficult time accepting their more complex emotions.
In relationships, you’re very loyal once you commit—it can just take you a little time to get to that point. “You have an emotional need to be respected and for people to understand that just because you’re not mushy-gushy doesn’t mean you don’t love them,” Page says. You’re super responsible, but need to have strong boundaries so your reliability isn’t taken advantage of at work.
Aquarius Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Uranus
Key Traits: Innovative, Community-Minded, Futuristic
“Aquarius is very innovative, very groundbreaking, very humanitarian,” Kelly explains. “With this Moon sign, we see a very strong interest in social components of things, how the collective is experiencing things, how people at large are moving through the world, and how their needs are being met.” Someone with an Aquarius Moon may be very philanthropic, and they may thrive by giving and receiving advice from others.
At the same time, with your Moon sign in Aquarius, you have a strong need to be different and find where you belong. “You need to be honored for your brilliance and for people to know that you’re unique,” Page says. You love experiences with people, places, and situations that are different from what you grew up with, and are often drawn to people from different cultures and countries. Still, you’re always looking for someplace to fit in.
If you’re not able to have new experiences, you can feel detached from those around you, which is why it’s so crucial for you to travel when you can. Side note: You have a need for strong friendships and relationships and will often stay buddies with an ex when things don’t work out.
Pisces Moon Sign
Ruling Planet: Neptune (Classical Ruler: Jupiter)
Key Traits: Psychic, Poetic, Dreamy
Got your Moon sign in Pisces? You’re the romantic of the zodiac, and love being loved—exactly as you are. “You need to feel that someone will accept you, warts and all,” Page says. But you tend to feel personally victimized when you think life is unfair or that someone is treating you badly.
Montúfar shares that a Pisces Moon gives a glimpse into the unseen, and you tend to be on the more psychic side. This focus on your inner world and emotions can sometimes keep you from being firm with the people in your lives, but there is hope. “They’re very soft and dreamy, angelic, [and] can be a little too sweet or sensitive, but once they figure out their boundaries and alone time, they can be happy,” she says.
FYI: You often want to have answers to questions that are unanswerable, and can be seriously impacted by tragedies. You find fulfillment when you can do something where you help alleviate suffering or do something that you believe in, even if it’s as simple as helping out a friend.
What is a lunar return?
You might be familiar with a Saturn return (which occurs every 29 to 30 years and marks a period of maturity), but your Moon sign also goes through a return (and lucky for you, you won't have to wait 30 years).
"The lunar return occurs when the transit moon returns to the same sign, degree, and house as the natal moon," a.k.a the Moon sign you were born under, says professional astrologer Liz Simmons. For example, if you were born with an Aries Moon at 12 degrees in your first house of self and identity, then your lunar return would occur when the moon reenters Aries at 12 degrees in your first house, Simmons explains.
The moon has an incredibly quick transit (this luminary spends about two and a half days in each sign), meaning that everyone goes through a lunar return once a month, Simmons adds. It's the fastest astrological return! (In comparison, your solar return, which occurs on or near your birthday, only takes place once a year.)
Given that the moon rules your emotions and intuition, your lunar return can make you extra sensitive to your current situations, triggers, and attuned to your gut feelings, says Simmons. "You might also notice that your dreams are more vivid and complex than usual, alluding to things in your everyday life," she adds.
With this in mind, "the best way to make the most of your lunar return is to observe and rest," per Simmons. "Since the moon has such poignant energy, the lunar return can mark the time when you may need to pause for the cause." This might include: journaling, talking to a loved one, spending time at home, and/or practicing self-care to nurture your soul.
You especially want to prioritize those self-care days if your lunar return falls on a new moon, full moon, or eclipse as those lunar phases will amplify the importance of your transit! A new moon lunar return could bring self-renewing energy, while a full moon lunar return could conclude an emotional cycle, says Simmons. Meanwhile, a lunar return that falls on an eclipse could "bring forth fated yet unpredictable events."
All of this to say that you might want to have your manifestation journal and tarot deck ready for your next return. (Oh, and consider scheduling your therapy appointment around this time, too, to really unlock some things.)
Meet the Experts
Narayana Montúfar is a professional astrologer and author of Moon Signs: Unlock Your Inner Luminary Power. Donna Page is a professional astrologer and counselor. Aliza Kelly is an astrologer and bestselling author of There Are No Coincidences: A Manifestation Deck and Guidebook. Liz Simmons is a professional astrologer, tarot reader, and contributor to Astrology.com based in Salem, Massachusetts.
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