Mark Caudill: Reporter suffers broken rib in freak injury
As freak injuries go, this could be the freakiest.
I broke a rib falling out of bed. The culprit was an animal figurine, a giraffe, to be exact.
To set the scene, it was about 5 a.m. one day last week. I was in the middle of a nightmare. Some guy was trying to rob me.
As I tried to fight him off, I threw a punch and went careening off the side of my bed, crashing into my nearby nightstand.
I knocked off most everything on the nightstand, including four animal figurines.
I landed — hard — on the giraffe. It dug into the middle of my rib cage on the left side of my back.
By the time I got to the newspaper a few hours later, a co-worker said the lump that was forming was the size of a softball. I don't think it was that big, but it was a sizable knot.
Aside from the obvious pain, I was having trouble breathing. Focusing on work helped to distract me.
I assumed it was a deep bruise, but more than 48 hours later, I was not feeling any better.
Two painful days with no improvement led to ER trip
I had a feeling I should seek medical help and went to the emergency room at University Hospitals Samaritan Medical Center in Ashland.
As I waited to see someone, I thought back to my birthday in the summer of 2022. I wound up in Samaritan's ER with COVID-19 and heart issues, the latest in my string of medical maladies.
X-rays revealed a broken rib this time. As injuries go, it's not that serious, but it's a pain because so many involuntary actions are now difficult.
In addition to breathing, the broken rib makes clearing my throat agony. Sneezing or coughing? Forget it.
Dr. Cameron LeMasters entered my bay and told me I looked familiar. Maybe it's because I've been a local reporter for 34 years, or maybe it's because I tend to show up at hospitals.
A nurse later gave me a shot of some kind of drug. She told me the shot would be painful, that the medication would burn.
It burned like hell, but it later provided more relief than any other medicine I have taken since the accident.
Before my discharge, they gave me a prescription for Percocet and a breathing device.
I was a little leery about taking Percocet, a narcotic, but I looked forward to the benefits.
The breathing device was new to me. A nurse explained it would be like drinking a milkshake. I have to breathe in deeply 10 times, trying to reach a certain number to keep the lungs expanding. There is a risk of pneumonia otherwise, which I would not have guessed.
I have to do the exercise every two hours while awake. After each session of 10 breaths, I have to make myself cough, which is beyond painful.
Last Friday night, I went to see the Lexington-Shelby football game and stood on the sidelines, which probably wasn't the best decision.
Thanks for allowing me to sit on the police department's golf cart at halftime, Chief Combs.
Percocet has been ineffective
I picked up my Percocet prescription on Saturday morning. While lying in bed before I got up, I had to sneeze. I thought my body was going to split open.
Because Percocet is so potent, I can't drive after taking it. My plan was to take one at night, but I wanted to see how the drug would affect me.
I ran a few errands and got food to get me through the day on Saturday, so I wouldn't have to drive again that day. I popped my first Percocet and waited to feel great again.
It didn't happen.
I could not tell any difference in my pain level several hours later. Still, I continue to take a Percocet pill each night. During the day, I'm relying on Tylenol.
For most of the weekend, I lay on my right side, which is predominantly how I sleep. It is the one way I don't feel any pain.
A nurse at the ER told me I should feel better in a couple of weeks. A broken rib is an awkward injury, one that's difficult to treat.
I will just have to wait. If you someone yowling in pain, it's probably me.
419-521-7219
X (formerly Twitter): @MarkCau32059251
This article originally appeared on Mansfield News Journal: News Journal reporter falls out of bed during nightmare, breaks rib
