Mandy Moore has a goal for 2024: 'I want to refocus a little bit more back on myself'
The Unwind sees experts, influencers and celebrities sharing their approaches to wellness and mental health. Learn more about what prioritizing well-being looks like, from self-care rituals to setting healthy boundaries to the mantras that keep them afloat.
When it comes to figuring out how to best center herself amid the hustle and bustle of everyday life, Mandy Moore celebrates adaptability. “I [give] myself the grace to recognize that I'm going to have to be more equipped with different tools at different times on different days,” Moore tells Yahoo Life. “It may depend on my cycle. That’s how I feel like I can manage whatever stress may sort of arise in life. One day, I might want a glass of wine at the end of the day, and another day, I might just want some tea, or I might just want to go to bed early and snuggle in bed with my book. Every day is going to look a little bit different.”
The Emmy nominee also gives herself permission to recognize that she might feel better “tackling things on one day versus another.” But having “as much of a robust toolbox as possible to pluck from” is key for her self-care and well-being. “Like today, I’m going to meditate for five or 10 minutes, or today, I’m going to put on an eye mask and try to shut my eyes for 30 minutes and set my alarm on my phone to wake me up,” she says.
And having been “pretty much a cat mom the entirety” of her life, Moore finds that caring for her kitties benefits her mental health. “[My cats] are such a grounding force,” says the actress, who recently partnered with Purina Cat Chow for the brand’s 60th anniversary by writing the foreword for 60 Years, 60 Stories: Celebrating the Extraordinary Impact of Cats, which features personal stories from cat owners on how their cats have impacted their lives. Purina is donating all proceeds from the books to Pet Partners, the leading nonprofit for registering volunteer therapy animal teams.
Moore has found that continuing to share her home with furry companions as an adult and parent can be centering. “No matter the chaos that may be happening around you, or outside of you, being able to come home and know that I have them there, and I have to think about them and make sure that they’re fed and they're socialized and they’re happy and content — because it contributes to the energy in the household — is a really big part of our lives,” she says.
The mom of two also credits her cats with preparing her for motherhood. “I think you cannot discount thinking about another life outside of your own and the responsibility that comes with that,” says Moore. “The companionship aspect that they bring you — I can’t imagine my life without them.”
Now that sons August (Gus), nearly 3, and his baby brother Oscar (Ozzie), 1, are in the picture, Moore notes that the demands of parenthood prevent her from fixating on her mental health — for better or worse. “I feel like, oddly, becoming a parent has quieted some of that for me, maybe because so much of my energy and attention is focused on them right now,” she says. “Maybe in another season of my life where they’re a little older and don’t need us quite as much in the same way, I’ll be able to focus back on myself again.”
Still, she’s craving more time for herself, admits Moore. “It does feel a little out of balance, if I'm being honest with you right now,” she says. “So I feel like 2024 is going to be the time when I want to refocus a little bit more back on myself — like, ‘OK, what can I do to make sure that I’m also taking care of me and not just taking care of others?’”
While it’s an ongoing practice to find that kind of balance, Moore says it helps that she shares the mental load with her husband, Taylor Goldsmith, with whom she tied the knot in 2018. “Communication is everything,” she says. “I feel very lucky to be in partnership with somebody that understands that and recognizes it and believes in it and wants to have conversations around it. There’s nothing that’s off the table.”
Having open lines of communication has empowered Moore to speak up for herself. “[I’ll say,] ‘I feel a little underwater right now — could you help with X, Y and Z? Could you step up to the plate a little bit more in this regard? I need a bit more help in this general area right now,’” she explains. “Taylor's always been very amenable to that and doesn't take offense. Likewise, I try to follow suit and not take offense either. I think that’s so important to be in that kind of partnership if you can find it. I don’t know what I would do without that.”
The This Is Us star has also found therapy to be an “incredible resource throughout” her life. “It ebbs and flows in terms of, like, when I'm going more regularly, but that’s something that I felt like I could always lean on and was always helpful,” she says.
Being able to create as an artist and musician also serves as a valuable therapeutic outlet for the multi-hyphenate entertainer. “[In sorting] through how I feel about certain events and experiences in my life, I have the added benefit of infusing it into my work,” says Moore. “Not carrying it around as emotional baggage is the ultimate gift of my job. I don't have to sit with it. I can dissect it, I can unpack it and then, ultimately, put it into the work. I love that my job allows me to do that. Not that I don’t necessarily take things home with me at the end of the day, but I feel like it’s an incredibly resourceful way to digest some of those things that have happened in life.”
She’s also up for trying different practices. “I love hearing about new things [that are] ultimately going to bring me peace or help with my mental health,” says Moore.
And when it comes to regularly incorporating any healthy habit into her life, Moore is more interested in setting goals versus New Year’s resolutions. “So, then, you’re not letting yourself down and you’re not disappointed if you’re not meeting some arbitrary expectation,” she says. “I’m a rule follower for sure. But I feel like anytime I put any stringent guidelines on myself ... I just am not motivated to follow through."
For Moore, it all comes down to setting healthy priorities: “Trying to reframe it like, ‘I would love to spend more time working on my mental health this year,’ ‘I really want to find a new therapist, ‘I really want to try meditating every day or three times a week' — like, building up to something too,” she says. “Baby steps [allow] you to follow through in a real way.”