How Can I Find Hope? Ways to Embrace the Future With Confidence
Research shows feeling hopeful doesn’t just put a smile on your face, it leads to concrete benefits, from boosting your immune system to increasing your levels of success. But between being bombarded with bad news stories from around the world to closer-to-home struggles in your personal and professional lives, summoning this emotion can feel like an upward battle. You’re not alone if you’re thinking, “How can I find hope?” Keep reading for six simple ways to tap this powerful emotion and spark the momentum that will lead to a brighter future.
How can I feel more hopeful?
1. Focus on pathway thinking
What makes hope so powerful? It’s connected to our values, says psychologist Anthony Scioli, PhD., professor of clinical psychology at Keene State College and coauthor of The Power of Hope: Overcoming Your Most Daunting Life Difficulties—No Matter What. Indeed, rather than wishful thinking, hope is
pathway thinking — the ability to set goals, adds hope researcher Chan Hellman, PhD, professor at the University of Oklahoma and Director of the Hope Research Center. “Ask yourself if you want to set a goal in a specific area of your life, be it professional or personal. When we’re overwhelmed by bigger problems in society, it’s important to focus on what we can control.”
2. Discover the 4 pillars of hope
To remember the critical elements of hope, just think MASS (Mastery, Attachment, Survival and Spirituality). “We need all four facets for hopefulness,” says Scioli. Mastery is just as it sounds: having a measure of control in our life. This facet is more collaborative than “ego-driven,” he notes, and typically requires teamwork or reaching out for support. That brings us to Attachment, the universal need for strong social connections. Survival speaks to the very basic need of feeling safe and secure in life, “and that we always have options,” says Scioli.
?? The last “S” in MASS is no less important than the other facets, but it may benefit from a bit more explanation. “Life is difficult — there’s always a gap between where we are and where we want to be,” says Scioli. “This is where spirituality comes in, the feeling of salvation and peace of mind that comes from feeling a presence bigger than yourself.” Just looking for these four pillars in your life, he says, will help you build a foundation of hopefulness.
3. Consider taking three small steps
“Hope is a muscle we can build every day,” says pastor MaryAnn McKibben Dana, author of Hope: A User’s Manual. “It’s a choice we make to do whatever is the next right thing,” she adds, explaining that amid the onslaught of to-dos commanding our attention every day, hope is a “deeper reservoir of possibilities we can draw on. It’s a muscle we can build up.” One way Dana learned to flex her hope muscle? “When I was feeling low during Covid, I realized I was missing three things: beauty, relationships and action.”
“Finding a way to access the beauty of nature connects us to awe, while calling a friend nurtures relationships in a world where it’s so easy to feel disconnected.” ??As for taking action, she discovered that doing something simple like cleaning her office when she felt discouraged, led to the next small action. “Small steps build momentum and help stop the spiral of worrying — and hope is all about taking action.”
4. Jot down ‘joy clues’
??Grab a piece of paper and draw a vertical line down the middle, suggests Scioli. “For each of the four domains of MASS, write a threat to it,” he says. “For example, under ‘Mastery,’ you might write that you feel helpless. Then challenge that thought on the right side of the page with something you do have control of. Or, for ‘Attachment,’ you might write that you feel alone; answer that thought with something more realistic, like a list of people you can reach out to.” He adds that this simple practice is called “reality surveillance,” reconstructing your world around signs of hope.
5. Find inspiration in your hope role models
There are two kinds of hope,?? says Scioli. “The active state of hoping, or ‘acute hope,’ that we feel during an illness or a challenge, and hopefulness, a steady trait that’s about long-term thinking.” The latter comes from a very old definition meaning “a protected place” or “steppingstone to a higher elevation,” he adds. That “protected place” is an inner reserve, a strength that comes from within. Hopefulness is a trait that develops early in life, but not all of us were lucky enough to grow up in an environment where it was nurtured. “We can still develop it as adults; it just takes a little longer,” promises Scioli. “Find people who are natural hope providers and whom you feel safe around.” Such hope “role models” are shown to help strengthen our capacity to be open to life’s possibilities.
6. Look to your past to see your future
Because hope is based on “pathway thinking,” centered on goals, Hellman suggests looking back on your accomplishments to prove to yourself that, yes, you can achieve your dreams. “Think about a time when you did something you’re proud of,” he advises. “What were the barriers you overcame?” This simple question helps restore the belief in yourself that you’ve done hard things — and sparks the hope that you can do them again.
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