Hoda Kotb Reveals That She and Joel Schiffman Have Ended Their Engagement
Update, January 31, 2022:
Hoda Kotb announced on Today’s fourth hour that she and Joel Schiffman have called off their engagement. Hoda and Joel began dating in the summer of 2013. After six years together, the Today show coanchor revealed in November 2019 that she was engaged to the financier. Before the coronavirus pandemic, Hoda and Joel had hoped to tie the knot in the fall of 2020. After postponing it, the NBC star shared that they were aiming to have an intimate beach wedding in New York in the summer of 2021.
Hoda addressed the personal matter after Today fans noticed she wasn’t wearing her engagement ring. "Joel and I have had a lot of prayerful and really meaningful conversations over the holidays, and we decided that we're better as friends and parents than we are as an engaged couple," Hoda said to cohost Jenna Bush Hager.
She continued: "We decided that we are going to start this new year and begin it kind of on our new path as loving parents to our adorable, delightful children, and as friends. It's not like something happened. They say sometimes relationships are meant to be there for a reason or a season or for a lifetime. And I feel like ours was meant to be there for a season.”
Original, July 21, 2021:
For years, the Today audience only knew of Hoda Kotb's boyfriend as "Boots." When Hoda talked with her former fourth-hour co-host Kathie Lee Gifford about her weekends, nights out, or vacations, she'd mention her partner but never, ever by name.
On January 20, 2015 though, Hoda was forced to introduce the world to her guy, Joel Schiffman, when British tabloid The Daily Mail published photos of the couple on the beach. Ever since, Hoda has been a pretty open book, especially once the pair adopted their two daughters, Haley Joy and Hope Catherine.
In November, Hoda announced on Today that she was engaged to her boyfriend of six years after he popped the question while at dinner.
"I was totally shocked," she said. "He had a good poker face."
Here's a look at how the Today host and her fiancé's love story progressed — from the very first meeting to the grand marriage proposal:
The couple meets at a book signing.
Hoda met the financier in the summer of 2013 when speaking at an event for Wall Street professionals. She was signing books after her talk when Joel approached her. Before revealing his identity, Hoda shared the meet-cute on the talk show Bethenny.
"It was one of those events they ask us to speak at and it was pouring rain and it was a bunch of Wall Street guys. I didn't even want to go," said Hoda. "They asked me to sign some books and one guy is like, 'Can you sign it to my grandma?' And this guy walks up and he's like, 'I'll take a book.' And I was like, 'Who do you want me to write it to — your girlfriend, your wife, your aunt?' And he goes, 'Write it to me.'"
Afterwards, a contact from the event emailed Joel, who emailed Hoda back. They went on a date — and the rest is history.
She makes it "official" by introducing him to Kathie Lee Gifford.
When Hoda knew things with Joel were getting serious, she planned a double date with her Today co-host Kathie Lee Gifford and her late husband, former football player and sports commentator Frank Gifford. Hoda talked about their first double date on Bravo's Watch What Happens Live.
"That went well," Hoda said. "Look, he loved [Kathie-Lee]. He met Frank — he was enamored. I mean, come on, he was on bended knee."
Frank Gifford passed away August 2015.
The couple goes public in a big way.
Billy Bush was filling in for Kathie the morning The Daily Mail published photos revealing the identify of Hoda's secret boyfriend.
"I'm looking at the Daily Mail online, and they're outing you and your boyfriend!" Bush exclaimed on-camera. "This is two years going you've protected this guy and they're outing you on the beach!"
Hoda responded: "Here's the thing … you know when you're keeping something so close to the vest? And I have kept this so close to the vest, I didn't even say his name. We called him Boots forever because we just showed his shoes [on the show].
"It's almost been two years, so you know what we decided: Why not? Joel is out from the shadows!" she said. "I feel some relief. I talked to him this morning and he said, 'Who cares?' Who cares!"
Now, Hoda doesn't shy away from sharing fun family moments on social media, like Joel's 60th birthday celebration.
They decide to move in together.
In October 2016, Hoda revealed the couple was moving in together.
"Joel and I are getting an apartment together, so we went to see it with the measuring tape," Hoda revealed on her SiriusXM series The Hoda Show. "It's a little weird to be in your 50s and we're like, 'Hey, we're moving in!' It's like you're kids. It's so weird."
Though Hoda was married from 2005 to 2007 to tennis coach Burzis Kanga, it was still a big step in the relationship to get a place with her new beau.
"I was afraid to tell my own mother that I was moving in with my boyfriend. I was afraid. I don't know," Hoda said. "I know it sounds weird — I've been married. It's like, 'Whatever!' But it's weird. It's a little odd."
They start a family.
The then-52-year-old Hoda and 58-year-old Joel adopted baby girl Haley Joy in February 2017. In a People interview, Hoda explained that treatment for breast cancer left her unable to conceive. After moving in with Joel, who has a daughter from a previous relationship, Hoda broached the topic of adoption.
"I was afraid to even say it out loud, because then it felt so real," Hoda told the magazine. "I said, 'Think about it for a day or a week or whatever.' And he said,'I don't need a day. Let's get this journey going.' At that point I blubbered like a baby. It was like the dam burst."
Hoda explained that they worked with a New York adoption agency and left Joel's name off the paperwork to simplify the process. "Haley will call him Dad," she said.
Still, the couple had more love to give: They gave Haley Joy a sister, Hope Catherine, in April 2019. "We like the idea of Haley [having] a sibling because she has had such interesting circumstances to grow up. So it would be nice to be able to share it with somebody," Hoda told Entertainment Tonight.
In October 2020, Hoda opened up to People again — this time about the possibility of her and Joel adopting a third child. With Haley Joy already 3 years old and Hope Catherine recently celebrating her first birthday, the duo still has plenty of love to give.
"It's funny, I think to myself — and I've obviously had a conversation with Joel about it, many conversations — but I feel like, well, can we? Yes,” she told the outlet. “Will our family be better with it? Yes. Do we have enough love in the house? Yes. All the answers seem to say yes.”
In July 2021, Hoda revealed to Andy Cohen that she and Joel have been actively looking to adopt, but that COVID has made the process a bit more complicated. "You know what's funny about the adoption stuff that's going on now, apparently it's really slow during this time, during COVID," she said. "I thought it would be a different game."
She continued:"They said that a lot of people who maybe would normally feel like it would be something they'd want to do, have a child and then give it to someone to raise because they couldn't, are holding onto things because they don't have anything in that moment. So that's what I've heard from our agency, everything's slow, but they say wait wisely and just be, so we're just going to be."
The couple is ready to walk down the aisle.
Six years and two kids later, Joel and Hoda have decided to get married. While there aren't too many wedding details yet, Hoda did reveal the sweet way Joel popped the question.
"We ended up having a little dinner on the beach," she said on Today, clarifying that the two were in the middle of a tropical vacation. "And he was like, 'I have something else I would like to say,' and he said some beautiful things, and then he got down on one knee. Then he said, 'Would you be my wife?'''
Way back in September 2018, Hoda told Andy Cohen of Watch What Happens Live that she had every intention of being with Joel for the rest of her days, ring or no ring.
"I’m going to be with Joel until my last breath — I know that."
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