This Is What Happens When You Give Your Ex An Exit Survey
On today's episode of BuzzFeed Daily, we broke down the top pop culture headlines AND talked about the concept of going to your ex for sex advice — and why it could be the key to saving your next relationship.
So let's dive right into it! Recently we talked to relationship expert Shan Boodram about her role on the new show Ex-Rated, how to put your ex's feedback to use, and more. Here's some of what we learned:
BuzzFeed Daily: We have to know — as a relationship expert, what are some of the most common issues that couples are asking for your help with these days?
IFC / GYFCAT / Via gfycat.com
Shan Boodram: It's the pandemic-related issues that came up. So it's differences in sex drive, differences in intimacy needs, differences in how people want to spend their free time, or differences in how couples work. I mean, that's a massively huge one that happened as all of a sudden now your coworkers with your lover and you were like, "I actually don't like them at work." So I think everything is still settling out from a year of topsy turvy-ness. And a lot of people's relationships are feeling the effects of that still.
BuzzFeed Daily: So Ex-Rated bounces off of the growing trend of sending standardized "exit surveys" to all of their previous romantic partners. I'm curious, what are some of the most common things you found that exes held onto? And what did the contestants learn from going through this experience?
AB: What I do for a living is largely talk about sex, and I talk about sex mostly to a woman audience, or people who identify as women. And it's fascinating how many men were completely unaware that their female partner had never had an orgasm. And that was news to them. Like "What?!" And that happened in repeated episodes. And I think that's really fascinating. And it's going to spark some really good conversations among existing couples. I think the show has to be called Ex-Rated. I was on Andy Cohen Show, Watch What Happens Live last week, and we played this game with two people who are also in the Bravo universe, who are on Shahs of Sunset. But they're a couple and you know, they're fully in love right now. And we played the Ex-Rated game and it was like, "Babe, what would you give me in foreplay?" "10." "Babe, what would you give me in oral?" "10." And so everybody thinks they're 10 because your current partner is going to say that. But in the aftermath, you might find out two years later that like actually was a 10 in effort and 2 in execution.
BuzzFeed Daily: Did any revelation on the show shock you or have you just heard it all at this point?
SB: Oh, I definitely haven't heard it all. I think there's — I would never say that. I've been in the space now for 15 years and I'm learning something new every single day. I learn new terms every single day. And the greatest teacher is my audience or the people that I work with, the people that are blessed. I'm fortunate enough that people trust me enough to share intimate parts of their lives or I'm part of projects like Ex-Rated where I'm seeing a really in-depth look into someone's love life and there's always "ahas" that are being had. And so I learned a lot from the show, especially positions that people really like. I learned different techniques. I had never heard somebody's oral sex skills being referred to as "shark week."
We also talked about how it’s been a wild week for “Friends” fans.
@friends / GIPHY / Via giphy.com
Months after it was revealed that David Schwimmer and Jennifer Aniston were crushing on each other while filming the show, a quote “insider” told Closer magazine the two have been dating IRL. Naturally Ross and Rachel stans lost their collective minds, but apparently too soon — a rep for David told BuzzFeed News that the rumors are just that: rumors.
Meanwhile, Chet Hanks continues to be extremely Chet Hanks.
As always, thanks for listening! And if you ever want to suggest stories or just want to say hi, you can reach us at [email protected] or on Twitter @BuzzFeedDaily.
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