What every young woman should know about sexual harassment at work
It is a weird time for working women. In the wake of a series of serious sexual harassment allegations, employees and employers all over the world are starting to wake up to the fact that this is endemic - and needs to be addressed urgently.
Yet, in the meantime, many women are wondering whether there’s any practical way to deal with wandering hands - and worse - in order to ensure that no-one else’s impropriety will harm their professional prospects.
To put it simply, it’s like this: a Westminster enquiry will hopefully, eventually have a positive impact, but if you’re already dreading the Christmas party because you spent last year’s locked in the loo hiding from creepy colleagues, you need practical, immediate support and advice. Fast.
It’s especially important if you’re relatively new to the world of work. It’s all very well for Anne Robinson to complain that we are “fragile” - she’s a septuagenarian millionaire. Things are very different when you can’t tell the person who’s touching your knee to eff off, because they might fire you.
Ultimately, it shouldn’t be your responsibility to avoid being harassed at work, because no-one should be harassing you. But here are some steps you can take to ensure that you’re as protected as possible...
Tune into the culture
It’s not always possible, but this is a vital step to take if you’re starting work, or between jobs. When you go for an interview, keep your eyes and ears wide open. What percentage of the other employees are women? Is the workforce diverse? Is the receptionist female, and most importantly, how are other people treating them? Are the men loud and shouty?
Sometimes it’s difficult to ask questions in an interview that establish the company’s commitment to equality, but you can learn plenty just by looking around. If it feels like the sort of office where Finchy from The Office might turn up and tell a tit joke, you do not have to work there. There will be plenty of other, better jobs - I promise. Even though it might feel wrong to turn down work, it’s always right to put your happiness and wellbeing first. If you’re currently working in that sort of environment and it’s wearing you down, it’s probably time to escape.
Sexual harassment at work in the UK
There is safety in numbers
Here’s a dilemma. Your (male, older) boss has just told you that he’s very impressed by something you mentioned in a meeting, or he wants to talk to you about an exciting future project. Over lunch. In the pub.
It might be fine. There’s a chance that he’s just being friendly. Also, you want to progress, you want to impress him, and you’re flattered that he has picked you out. Yet, something murky in your mind is surfacing, thinking “Just me, in the pub? How odd. Why didn’t he just book a meeting room?”
Here’s a tactic. Smile brightly, tell him that you’d be delighted to have lunch with him, and say “I was having that very conversation about the Sanderson account with Jack and Emily! I really think they should come, too!”
If the situation is fine, your boss will probably agree. If he insists on only your company, tell him that you’ve suddenly remembered you must rush into town and buy a birthday card for your elderly Auntie, but perhaps if he has space in his diary, you can book the meeting room for him and have that work conversation at work.
Find your women
The Westminster scandal emerged thanks to a secret Westminster WhatsApp group, in which women working in the corridors of power shared information warning each other when they had experienced inappropriate behaviour from colleagues. Globally, every headline making accusation and allegation has one thing in common - it has been backed by a chorus of voices.
When women come together and support each other, it’s harder to undermine us. Finding your work girl gang can be tricky, and you can’t exactly bond by saying “Hello! Did you get sexually harassed today?” But it’s worth trying to establish a network with trusted co-workers, who will give you support and impartial advice when you need it.
This is an invaluable tool - I’m in a Whatsapp group of fellow freelance writers, and we regularly come together to discuss how to deal with an unreasonable situation. It also gives you the opportunity to connect with the women you admire the most in the office, and discover how they command respect. These women make great role models - if you go out for drinks, always try to leave the pub shortly after they do.
Trust your gut
A 2016 report from the TUC found that more than half of all working women in the UK have experienced sexual harassment, from unwanted touching to comments about their bodies and sexually explicit jokes.
So if someone is making you squirm and you feel uncomfortable, ashamed and anxious, know that you’re not imagining it. Your feelings are valid. Under the 2010 Equality Act, sexual harassment is illegal.
Q&A | Sexual harassment
You do have rights, and in theory, if you keep a record of your harassment and make your manager (or their manager) aware, they should resolve the issue for you.
Admittedly, it is difficult to prove. Serial harassers are bullies, and they look for opportunities to use their power against the powerless. Reporting them takes serious courage, but it’s vital to remember that you are entitled to a safe working environment.
You haven’t been hired to provide some sort of flirty entertainment for a bored boss. You deserve the chance to come to work and do your job.