Celebrity Hunted episode 1 review - Stanley Johnson stole the show with old-school spy skills
It can’t be easy going incognito when you’re the Prime Minster’s father but Stanley Johnson hardly helped himself on Celebrity Hunted (Channel 4). Despite his real-life espionage experience, the hapless septuagenarian’s hilarious lack of basic spy-craft skills stole the show.
Johnson Sr has admitted his recruitment to the intelligence services in 1964 and subsequent spook training, yet he hopped into a custard yellow jeep (hardly inconspicuous) and used his bank card to make purchases, alerting his pursuers to his location. He declined to take discreet back roads and blithely drove down motorways lined with traffic cameras.
He was caught on CCTV buying a burner phone, enabling the hunters to intercept his calls. Rather than camp out or bunk up with a friend, he checked into a hotel under his own name. Partner-in-crime Georgia “Toff” Toffolo gnashed her teeth in frustration. Frankly, so did us viewers.
As the reality chase thriller returned for a special edition in aid of Stand Up To Cancer, eight famous faces - OK, famous might be overstating it in some cases - went on the run and tried to evade capture for a fortnight.
Rugby players Gavin Henson and Martin Offiah bickered like long-suffering spouses as they hid out in a North Wales holiday cottage. When Offiah left something unpleasant in the en suite lavatory, it proved too much for poor Henson. “Pick it up!” he yelled. “Are you ill?”
Chefs Aldo Zilli and Jean-Christophe Novelli tried too hard to prove how flamboyant they were, which mainly involved shouting at each other in comedy accents.
The Only Way Is Essex's Lydia Bright and Lucy Mecklenburgh (me neither) tried to flag down help from passers-by and wondered if they should remove their sunglasses to be more recognisable. I’m not sure that’d help much, ladies.
Most entertainment, however, came from the cavalier Johnson. Quaffing champagne on an old pal’s country estate, he burbled: “We got here in one swell foop. I mean, fell swoop. If this is being a fugitive, it’s rather agreeable.” He promptly misread a map and got lost.
Even the forgiving Toff started questioning his credentials. “Stanley’s spy skills are 50 years out of date,” she sighed, shortly before they were cornered at Birmingham New Street station. At least Johnson was in the process of purchasing this very newspaper. He might be an inept undercover operative but he has impeccable taste.
