34 Stupid "Perks" Employers Offered Instead Of Actually Paying Their Employees Well

With inflation and rents on the rise, COVID still around, and customers and clients acting as unhinged as ever, it's a tough time for employees.

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Employers are feeling greedier than ever, and cost-cutting in the name of the pandemic hasn't helped. To offset or distract from all this, many employers have offered "perks" or gifts when really all their employees want is better benefits and wages.

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Here are 34 infuriatingly lame "perks" members of the BuzzFeed Community have received instead of things that would actually have helped them pay the bills.

1."My mom has worked for a small property management company for years. Since she has lymphoma, she asked for health insurance or a pay raise to help cover medical costs. She received a bonus of $500...in Dunkin' Donuts gift cards."

—swrightontime

2."Instead of a year end bonus, we got certificates. And not gift certificates either, legit certificates like the kind you would get in elementary school for things like participating or being a 'super reader.' Gee thanks, this will go a long way!"

—nc9497

3."I worked at a big shitty bank in Lexington, Kentucky. They paid full time platform (non-tellers) female employees $12/hr. I could go on and on about how fucked that place was to work, but I’ll stick with the 'perk.' They gave us a Christmas party with 'thousands of dollars worth' of raffle prizes one year. We were hounded to pester our business customers for donations. These donations were our raffle prizes. I lived in a tiny one bedroom apartment, so winning a certificate for a month of free field pesticides with a 12-month contract with a farm pest control company warmed my heart."

—Anonymous

4."The opportunity to participate in a 7 a.m. baking contest the boss was judging. I think he just wanted us to bring him breakfast."

—Anonymous

5."A refillable water bottle with the company name on it during the middle of the pandemic. As a thank you for 'working through these tough times.' Took two years to get a raise. Still doesn't cover all my bills."

—heb32

6."We got $1 extra for every holiday we worked. Not even the days around it, which were always three times busier than the actual holidays, but the actual holiday. Think New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. Yeah, we had to work all the major holidays. Everyone was so bored and just wanted to be with their families, but we were promised $1 as compensation."

—Anonymous

7."I worked at a liquor store in Ontario when COVID-19 first happened. Instead of increasing our pay or giving us time off like other retailers were giving their employees, my work gave us a box full of Lindt chocolate eggs for all the employees to share. Not the best incentive to continue working during a pandemic."

—Anonymous

8."I wasn't paid enough to keep my phone turned on — or the utilities — for grueling work I'd never wish on anyone. When I asked about my pay, they told me I wouldn't be getting a cent more, but if the meat I would slice on the deli slicer came down to a nub that couldn't be used for orders, I could keep it. So I 'wouldn't go hungry at least.' This was at an upscale brunch place in Colorado. By far the worst place I've ever worked at. It kills me every time I see them on the local news."

—ashfoxoutoftheboxdesigns

9."There was a job I saw on an internship website that I considered applying for, but in order to submit the application, you had to pay A $400 FEE. The job was unpaid and fully remote, but — they were sure to include this in the description — you got a birthday shoutout on Instagram!"

—Anonymous

10."I work at a local health department. As a thank you for continuing to be forced to work during the pandemic, we were gifted a thank-you video from the board of health and a health department logo medallion. Cheers."

—Anonymous

11."The grocery store I worked at would have other employees fill out 'fill-in-the-name did a nice thing' forms and tape them up in the break room. Like, 'Jenny mopped up the puke from the drunken frat guy who hurled all over the deli. Good job, Jenny!' We couldn’t get scheduled 33 hours or more because that was considered full time (which came with actual benefits), but at least we got a crappy form hung in the break room."

—vw71squareback

12."Worked in an office. They announced that they bought an expensive new office chair for the employee of the month. The catch…you only got the chair for that month. The next month it went to the next employee. Nothing says thanks for your hard work like sharing a chair!"

—chickpea422

13."I’m an RN at a hospital. One day my unit manager gave me a roll of Life Savers candy and thanked me for 'being a lifesaver.' I don’t need (or want) a 'thank you' from management for doing my job. I’d just like to actually take the 30-minute lunch breaks that are deducted from my paycheck. I’d also like the hospitals to hire and schedule enough staff so that I don’t have to choose between my patients’ safety and getting a drink of water or using the restroom for over 12.5 hours a day."

"PS: the '12 hour nursing shift' is a MYTH — we’re usually at the hospital for longer and often unpaid for the extra time. It may be hard for us, but the worst part is that it’s dangerous for you and your loved ones."

—Anonymous

14."Won an award at work. My reward was a corporate branded cup."

—cbyolve4

15."I worked at a manufacturing company I consider a cult in disguise. I have endless stories about the unprofessional, elitist behavior of the owners and upper management. The 'perks' were always held over our heads. Fresh fruit once a week and access to a life coach that they hired and claimed was confidential (they weren’t, they had to tell management everything you said). They brought in a psychologist to teach us how to deal with stress (that they caused), and sent us to Dave Ramsey classes to 'give ourselves a raise.' What they didn’t do was pay their employees a fair wage, and only rewarded those willing to work seven days a week."

"Also, they would cater a pizza lunch for the office personnel once a month to promote 'team building' then take the HOURS old leftover pizza out to the production employees like someone feeding their leftover scraps to their dogs."

—Anonymous

16."I work for a private practice where it is a 60/40 split. Around the holidays, my boss likes to take some of that money and donate it to a charity of their choosing. Money that we earned them. While we receive no bonus, no benefits, no paid vacation or sick time, no taxes taken out of our checks, and no money for trainings. It’s a nice thought to donate to charity, but it does not cover up the fact that they should be working on these things."

—Anonymous

17."Our head office staff were all salaried, and we would get one paid 'free day' a month on a weekday so people could attend appointments, go on long weekends, etc. Sounds great, right? In reality, we were contracted for 38 hours per week but expected to work 40. Rather than paying the eight hours per month overtime, it was used as accrual towards the free day instead — which means this 'perk' led to being paid LESS."

—Anonymous

18."I work for a private practice, and instead of giving us benefits or taking out taxes, the head of our practice throws parties and constant social events. So I can’t have health insurance, but I am expected to socialize on my day off. Also, no one gets Christmas bonuses, but the head of our practice gives us gifts. We are also expected to give her a gift. This year, we collectively bought her a $450 gift card to a BnB, and she bought us bracelets that retail for $25. All because we’re 'a family.' More like toxic AF."

—Anonymous

19."A golden plunger. You heard me. If my students and I kept our room cleaner than the other classrooms, we got a plunger with gold spray paint to keep for the month. Oh, and they gave teachers a lunchbox with the school name on it."

—frampton315

20."I work for a (very) small company. Instead of the cost of living raises we asked for, given inflation is the worst it’s been in decades (with rent in my city rising even faster than the national average), we were given a Christmas party with two drinks and a plate of food. Our boss makes seven figures each year and owns three homes, however."

—annahill95

21."I worked as a pharmacy technician at a large grocery chain: We were granted 10% off store branded products and could wear college T-shirts on Saturdays during the (American) college football season."

—kiramekisakurai

22."I used to work at a school as support staff for children with developmental disabilities. It was very rewarding but also extremely challenging, and the pay was insultingly low. Their idea of benefits was 'bagel Fridays.' You got a bagel. They would often threaten to take away bagels if too many people called off or there was insufficient staffing. It was constantly understaffed, which is really sad for the kids who need more support. But at least there’s bagels...so sad."

—jaade_juniperr

23."I used to work for a big child care company. One year, for teacher appreciation week they gave us all stuffed animals of the corporate mascot. Just because I work with kids doesn't mean I'm a child. I'd much rather the money had been spent on art supplies for our classrooms."

—kimb27

24."Mandatory holiday party, that we had to drive to in a snowstorm, after work hours. We got a couple cheap drinks, bland food, and some 'entertainment' that most of us walked out on and instead chatted in the lobby. But 'team building!'”

—aditson

25."At a certain makeup retailer (pre-COVID, at least, things have changed), you got a bag of free products about monthly, which you weren’t allowed to resell — that was a fireable offense. You could give it away for free, but if you gave it away to an untrustworthy person and they tried to return it…they said they’d trace it back to you and you were screwed. It’s a nice perk, but you got so much more product than you could ever use before its expiration date."

"Out of curiosity, I itemized every bag I got ± it was always *at least* $600 (most cases, above $750). I’d much rather have the $600."

—f4bul0u5

26."No vacations at all May 15-August 15. But we can wear jeans on FriYAY! ??"

—tessa3838

27."Fairly early on in the pandemic, my work (social care provider) decided to reward us for going out into the community in full PPE to tend to our service users, putting our health on the line every single day for minimum wage and crippling base rate overtime. That hard earned 'prize' was a cheap wash bag filled with some out of date chocolates, an individual serving of broken biscuits, and travel sized face wash!"

"Where they thought we might be traveling to I’m not sure, but it probably should have been the job center!"

—katypoodles2812

28."One year, the HR department tried a 'Week of Invigorating,' and it couldn't have been more sexist if they tried. Women got diet sodas/Red Bulls; men got the full-sugar shit. Women got face masks, and men got shavers. Women got pink bubble bath; men got gift certificates to Buffalo Wild Wings."

"Needless to say, it didn't last after all the complaints. The men were getting way more money spent on them, while the women were expected to 'take care of themselves at home.' It bombed terrifically."

—witchyribbon84

29."I work in episodic television, and typically, at the end of a shooting season, there is a wrap party. After working tirelessly for 9+ months, no PTO, 12+ hour days, etc., we get a party with a four-hour open bar. And to make matters worse, it's BUDGETED into the end of the season. Instead of going to a stupid party and watching the people I work with get trashed, maybe budget us some higher/livable wages."

—Anonymous

30."My wfh job gave us giant travel mugs."

—s48b32a974

31."One year, for teacher appreciation they gave us an individual size bag of chips because 'we’re all that and a bag of chips.'"

—margaretb49238f5cc

32."Booked a taco truck. Not paid for, mind you. We still had to pay for the tacos."

—prettyp

33."I was the assistant manager at a retail store in the mall, and I was the manager on duty when a guy opened fire on another person in front of my store. I was at the front greeting people, so I saw and heard everything. I slammed our doors shut and got all my customers and coworkers to the backroom to safety. My district and regional manager called me and visited me telling me how thankful they were that I reacted quickly and did so well. They didn't offer any pay raise or hazard pay. They sent an edible arrangement filled with stuff I was allergic to."

—jjchambers1986

34."One year, my manager made a donation, in my name, to HER favorite charity and then said, 'You’re welcome!' Like, WTF?!"

—brittanywidener

What's the most meager or infuriating "perk" you got from your boss — especially during the pandemic? Let us know in the comments below!

Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.