'It's All Joever' now: Harris for president has ruined my anti-Biden merch business
Here’s a big middle-finger salute to President Joe Biden, who, by stepping aside as the Democratic presidential nominee, has singlehandedly ruined my “F--- Joe Biden” flag-making business.
When Biden got “elected” in 2020, I was patriotically disgusted, so I did what I could to help former President Donald Trump and my country by designing and manufacturing flags and signs that profanely attack the commander in chief. As one does.
I’ve been proud to run the only non-woke Midwestern “F— Joe Biden” flag-making company that also manufactures “Say Good Night, Sleepy Joe” fleece blankets and “It’s All Joever This November! MAGA 2024!” wind socks. And now I come to find out Sleepy Joe is standing down and Vice President Kamala Harris will likely be Trump’s opponent?
WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THE 20,000 “F— JOE BIDEN” FLAGS I ALREADY HAD PRINTED?!?
Joe Biden stepping aside has destroyed my anti-Joe-Biden business
It’s not like I can get my kids to go through and fix all the names with a marker, mainly because my kids said they find Harris “inspirational” and “exciting” and they don’t want to “be associated with spreading such a negative message for profit.”
Liberalism is a disease.
The only comfort I can take is knowing I’m not the only one suffering.
Even Trump is mad that all his Biden insults are now wasted
Trump himself posted on social media: “So, we are forced to spend time and money on fighting Crooked Joe Biden, he polls badly after having a terrible debate, and quits the race. Now we have to start all over again. Shouldn’t the Republican Party be reimbursed for fraud in that everybody around Joe, including his doctors and the Fake News Media, knew he was not capable of running for, or being, President?”
Gen Z wanted Biden gone. Now we have to prove this is the best way to beat Trump.
I agree! And I, too, should be “reimbursed for fraud,” whatever that means.
Joe, his doctors and the Fake News Media should have to pay for the warehouse full of “Buck Fiden” beer koozies I was going to give away at summer festivals along with each purchase of an “I’m Joe Biden, And I Forgot This Message” T-shirt.
We spent four years harping on Hunter Biden. Now it's worth nothing!
And don’t get me started on the merchandise that involves Hunter Biden. I’m sitting on 10,000 “Hunter Biden’s Laptop” plushies that now are worth less than all the Hunter Biden hearings that House Oversight Committee Chairman James Comer held.
This is an absolute disaster for patriots who’ve tried to monetize Trump’s heroic cruelty and for a Republican Party that, rather than legislating, spent the past four years looking for creative ways to demean President Biden.
Now, it will be all Harris all the time, and I have no prepared insults worth printing on a flag, bumper sticker or hat. This is going to require serious thinking, something I do not enjoy.
We have no catchy insults for Kamala Harris, but a ton of Sleepy Joe merch
I can’t call her Sleepy Kamala because she has more darn energy than I’ve ever seen. She doesn’t have a kid with a controversial laptop. I mean, what do I have to work with here?
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If Biden had just stayed in the race, I’d be fulfilling the American dream of making a small fortune by selling unnecessary paraphernalia that offends other Americans and exposes young children to harsh language.
Way to ruin everything, Sleepy Joe.
Follow USA TODAY columnist Rex Huppke on X, formerly Twitter, @RexHuppke and Facebook facebook.com/RexIsAJerk
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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Harris replacing Biden is killing off the Sleepy Joe insult merch game
