Hayden Panettiere says her body ‘ballooned’ days after brother’s ‘horrific’ death

Hayden Panettiere is opening up about the loss of her younger brother, Jansen.

“He was my only sibling, and it was my job to protect him,” the 35-year-old told People in an interview published Wednesday. “When I lost him, I felt like I lost half of my soul.”

Jansen’s death came on the heels of Panettiere getting sober after entering rehab in 2020 and leaving an abusive relationship with her ex-boyfriend Brian Hickerson.

The “Amber Alert” star had even started acting again, with her brother’s sudden death due to an undiagnosed heart condition at 28, happening three weeks before the “Scream 6” premiere in February 2023.

The “Bring It On: All or Nothing” alum didn’t leave her house after Jansen’s passing, especially due to photographers following her in the days after the tragedy.

“I had to see horrific paparazzi pictures of myself coming out of Jansen’s funeral, which happened in a very private place, and it was shocking,” Panettiere said. “My agoraphobia came out, which is something I’ve struggled with in the past.”

Within days, her grief manifested into a physical reaction from the shock and Panettiere recounted being virtually unrecognizable. “I just ballooned out,” she said of the rapid weight gain she experienced.

Panettiere noted that the “stress and cortisol” in her body caused the sudden change, which decreased her self-esteem. “I didn’t feel confident to put on clothes and get out of the house, but I also knew that I needed to get out and keep moving or I’d never stop looking and feeling this way.”

She added: “It became a destructive hamster wheel of, do I feel good enough to go out?”

Panettiere connected with personal trainer Marnie Alton through her publicist and slowly got back into working out.

The two connected on a personal level, with Panettiere sharing her stories from the past with the fitness guru on long walks.

“These long, beautiful walks where we could vent, and it would be this therapy session,” Panettiere told the outlet. “Marnie empowered me.”

And along with the open dialogue, the endorphins Panettiere was getting from burning fat also elevated her mood.

“My body just started reacting, not just from the working out. It allowed me to release the stress, the high expectations I’d always put on myself,” she said.

As her confidence rose, her agoraphobia faded. “There’s nothing like looking in the mirror and feeling like you look good enough to walk out the door,” acknowledged Panettiere.

These days, as she continues to cope with Jansen’s death, the “Nashville” vet has also gained a new perspective following the loss.

“When something that massive has happened to you, you really learn to pick your fights and just not let the little things upset you,” Panettiere said. “Because once something so horrific, so deep, so catastrophic happens in your life, there’s not much that can really rock you.”

The “Heroes” star is grateful to be feeling more like herself these days and is excited for the release of her new movie “Amber Alert,” which hits theaters Sept. 27. But the trauma of Jansen’s death will continue to linger.

“I will always be heartbroken about it. I will never be able to get over it,” Panettiere admitted. “No matter how many years go by, I will never get over his loss.”