Bachelor In Paradise Is Usually My Favorite Series Of The Franchise, But I May Draw The Line At The ‘Poop Baby’ Tease For Season 9

The Bachelorette packed a lot into its three-hour season finale, as Charity Lawson got engaged to Dotun Olubeko, and Joey Graziadei was announced as the next lead of The Bachelor. Fans also got their first preview of all the drama to come down on the beach on the upcoming season of Bachelor in Paradise. With its fun, tropical atmosphere, the return of fan-favorite cast members and a much-higher relationship success rate than the flagship series, Paradise has become my favorite show of the franchise. But I have to admit I’m much less enthused for Season 9 after the “poop baby” situation from the trailer.

Bachelor in Paradise offers fans a chance to see their favorite alumni from The Bachelor/Bachelorette come together on the beaches of Mexico, in a looser format that all but guarantees some messy drama. However, the messiness shown in the Season 9 teaser is definitely not the kind I’m talking about. In the preview Jesse Palmer’s voiceover declares that someone has a “serious medical emergency,” and a woman who appears to be Sam Jeffries from Clayton Echard's season proclaims she’s going on nine days of no pooping. An alleged medical professional is then shown explaining to her that:

The supposed doctor’s statement was followed by an image of a turtle’s head emerging from its shell. Keep it classy, Bachelor in Paradise.

While there were plenty of other stories teased in the preview — including several former Bachelorettes hitting the sand, the introduction of the “Paradise Truth Box” and even a wedding — I was immediately turned off by the thought of someone’s constipation becoming a plotline on the show.

For one thing, “delivering a poo baby” is a terribly painful image, with or without the accompanying turtle, and I can’t imagine that Sam Jeffries is super pumped to see her constipation journey play out on national TV. Others seemed equally as horrified at how far we’ve fallen, as one fan tweeted:

But also the show choosing to feature this as a storyline makes me think the producers have wildly misjudged what Bachelor Nation wants out of Paradise. We’re here for the tropical dating drama, not the bathroom “humor.” We want the beachy makeouts and love triangles, not these strange attempts to be silly. The Game of Roses podcast tweeted that it was giving vibes of the wholly unnecessary Salley Carson suitcase fiasco of Season 8:

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It’s also unclear if they want us to take the contestant’s situation seriously or not. Jesse Palmer effected a somber tone as he introduced the emergency that required a medic and an ambulance to arrive at the beach. Cut to ensuing “poop baby” hilarity, with another contestant helpfully exclaiming, “Out of your butt?” Check out the full promo for yourself:

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Can someone explain to me how this is considered “paradise”? This isn’t the first time they’ve used someone’s bowels as a Bachelor in Paradise storyline, as Hunter Haag’s IBS was played up during her short time on Season 8. The producers must have some indication that this type of story strikes a chord with a faction of the fans, and maybe there are many others who share this fan’s opinion:

Whether or not you’re a fan of the “poop baby,” there seems to be plenty to look forward to when Bachelor in Paradise Season 9 premieres. The show is moving to Thursdays this fall, airing at 9 p.m. ET — after The Golden Bachelor — on ABC. Both series will also be available to stream the next day with a Hulu subscription. Keep an eye on our 2023 TV schedule for all of the other upcoming premieres.